Rhapsody
by Dimitri Aidan
Summary: [Four Brothers, Slash] In which Jack doesn’t die, but Bobby does let a few things slip. As they try to rebuild and understand what’s growing between them, someone seeks to tear it all down.
1. Heaven's Door

Rhapsody

I don't own the Four Brothers, but here's how things would have gone it I did

Author: Dimitri Aidan

Rating; R to NC-17, as with most things it's all about the site.

Warnings: Slash, Sex, Violence, Language, Alternate Ending, Incest but not in a biological sense, and …other stuff. I'm a man of few plans but many whims.

Pairings: Bobby/Jackie, Angel/Sophia, Jerry/…Jerry's wife.

Notes: This isn't a fantasy/sci-fi/anime fandom, so it's a bit of a first for me. Realism…it could be tough. Let us venture forward together and find out.

Summery: In which Jack doesn't die, but Bobby does let a few things slip. As they try to rebuild and understand what's growing between them, someone seeks to tear it all down

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Chapter One

Heaven's Door

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Bobby didn't think he'd ever be able to sleep and not see Jackie, black clothes stark against his skin which was pale as the snow he was lying in with red seeping around him and staining the snow, replaying over and over in his mind. Hearing those agonized pain filled screams.

Not wordless screams, but his name, over and over again as he cowered behind a brick wall. Cowering for what? To protect himself? He wasn't supposed to be protecting himself; he was supposed to be protecting his brothers, especially Jackie. He wasn't like the rest of them, with blood behind them and an eternity on penance ahead of them. He was young, still clinging to some innocence, but he was the one who'd been shot and left to die.

He had the most ahead of him and Bobby had failed him.

He couldn't pretend he hadn't seen how startled the younger man had looked after they'd put down Mom's killers. Eyes wide and mouth slack…not the best he's ever looked, to be sure. Part of him had wished, as he pushed his brother towards the car and told him to get moving, that Jerry had come along instead of Jackie.

All their threats to set people on fire aside, it wasn't like Jack had ever been there for it. But Jerry didn't even fucking smoke anymore, let alone seem sold on the idea of watching someone run around consumed in flame. Once upon a time he would have through it funny.

He'd failed so miserably. Sure, Mom's killers were dead and Sweet was floating under the ice somewhere and his bitch of a cop was dead and no one had heard from Councilman Douglas in a while but…was it worth it? They'd lost a brother, if not by law then in heart and one of the few decent cops all in one moment. The house was in shambles and the cops were watching them more than a little closely.

And Jackie.

Bobby let his eyes drift over to the slight figure in the hospital bed. Everything around him was white, bleached, starched and sanitized white from end to end. Jackie, who was far from a big guy to begin with, looked even smaller and fragile than ever. Gauze crept out from under his hospital gown up to his neck and tubes were everywhere. The steady rise and fall of his chest along with the rattling sound of his breathing announced him as living far more than the _beep beep_ of the machine connected to him.

He could have died. Maybe should have. If Sophia hadn't called the ambulance on her cell phone while she was hiding in the house, if they hadn't gotten there almost the moment the shooting stopped, if they hadn't managed to keep Jackie from thrashing around and making the blood flow faster…

He would never banish the sound of Jackie screaming his name from his mind. Never. Didn't really want to, to be honest. At least it was something, a memory of life. He could have lost him so easily and not been able to do anything. Crying and begging him to hold on wouldn't have done anything. He hadn't been able to do anything but watch.

There were so many things he had wanted to say and when Jackie had lost consciousness damn if he hadn't said them, desperate to let him know that he was so much more than just a little brother before he was gone.

Angel, Jerry, and Sophia were blessedly silent about it. He'd all but confessed his undying, overly dramatic, and utterly pathetic devotion and they hadn't said anything. He couldn't have possibly loved them more for that.

If Jackie ever woke up he was pretty sure they'd be a little less kind but at the moment it was touch and go. He was still unstable, locked deep in a coma with the potential for infection still lingering. As much blood as he'd lost one good infection would finish him off. Bobby wasn't sure he could take any questions or accusations at the moment.

He wasn't sure when the last time he'd managed to get in more than an hours worth of sleep at a time was. Angel and Sophia were staying with Jerry at the moment and Bobby only saw them here, in the hospital room where he practically lived. When they made him leave at the end of the night, and they never failed to let him know when it was time to go, though the nurses always had soft words and sympathetic smiles.

He went home, slept in one of the few rooms without the windows shot out with the door shut tight to keep at least some of the chill out. When visiting hours started again he was there, waiting for them to allow him to watch over his brother once again.

Two weeks. Two weeks and no change.

Bobby had failed him.

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It was, in hindsight, as obvious set up. Everyone loved his mother, for someone to just pop up so soon after her death and insult her while flinging snow was…well, it was obvious. But things had been going to hell and he'd just wanted to get out of that damn house before things could get any worse. It had all gotten so fucked up so quickly. First mom, then having to actually watch that tape, hunting the killers and watching Angel and Bobby…

The snow had been coming down hard, whipping at him with icy claws so he'd barely seen it but he knew. The shadows of limbs moving and then the shots that rang out and shattered the silence of the deserted street. He'd never actually seen anyone die before, that tape from the convenience store aside. He'd been to his fair share of funerals but somehow when ever someone actually died he'd been absent, kept away by his brothers.

And then Jerry. Mixed up with Gangsters or…something. Fighting amongst each other, in her house, the only safe place Jack had ever known. It was too much like how things had been before coming to live with Mom, all too familiar to him. Home after home, one family that just kept him for the money, to a family that hated him, to a family that ignored him and back again, with periodic returns to his father's custody in between.

Not until Evelyn Mercer had anyone actually given a damn. He'd come there and she'd already had three boys in her home but when no one else wanted him she'd moved Bobby into the basement and made room for him there. She'd known his past, what his father had done to him and how bad things had been, how tainted he was and

"-Brain activity has increased considerably in the past thirty minutes. He still shows no sign of infection and has no problem breathing on his own. He could be coming out of it."

"He has a strong will to live; they all do. I'm very familiar with the Mercer Brothers I assure-"

she'd wanted him anyway. He hadn't understood why someone as good as her would want to waste time on him but she had and…he'd been so grateful. He would have died for her. He shouldn't have left. She'd encouraged him to go with his band though, to try and make it in New York but it'd been shit, pure and simple. He really wasn't that good.

He should have been here, in Detroit, taking care of her like she took care of him. He owed her so much more than to die in her front lawn.

The bullet had hit hard, nearly knocking him from his feet as it tore through him like he was a paper doll. Oddly enough it hadn't hurt as much as he had expected it would. It was the cold that was the worst at first, cutting through him to the very core of his body. It started before the shot made him go crawling through the snow, spreading from his fingertips inward in a kind of tingling wave. The pain was there of course, but busy doing a fucking tango on the edge of the chill. Shots rang out over his head and all around though he managed to not get hit again.

He knew, after hearing Bobby shout for him but never appear, that he was going to die, out in the snow alone in front of the only safe place in the world.

Alone.

He didn't want to be alone, god help him, not for this. He couldn't die alone '_ohgodpleaseno' _not alone. Mom's words echoed in his ears, thrumming like the blood he could feel spilling out of him. He was supposed to be safe with his brothers.

Spots danced in front of his eyes as copper filled his mouth.

"Bobby!" He screamed as the numbness crept its way deeper into him, driving its claws deeper and driving him further from himself. For a second he thought of Angel and Jerry but only Bobby's name felt right. He wanted Bobby with him.

He dimly heard an answer, a command to hold on amid the gunfire and shattering glass.

Seconds bled into each other and the copper in his mouth grew thick, coating his tongue and teeth, as the world turned gray and fuzzy. He tried to breath but could only swallow more of his own blood then try uselessly to cough it back out.

"Should we contact his family? His older brother will be upset if he wakes up and he isn't here; he's been sitting with him every day."

"There's no point, he won't be able to see him until the doctor checks him out anyway. Best to wait so he doesn't worry in the waiting room or cause a scene. Bobby Mercer won't take being told to wait lightly."

He screamed his brother's name again and against a vague promise was returned. Pain broke down the numb barrier triumphantly and his entire body stiffened, twisting painfully. He burned all over, he couldn't breathe around the fluid in his throat, and his eyes spilled tears.

His father's voice was loud in his head. 'Men don't cry; only fags cry. You're a worthless queer Jackie, worthless. Crying because no one is coming to save your pretty ass. Don't you know they don't care? That old whore who took you from me doesn't care and neither do you're brothers. Nothing but two dirty niggers and that useless degenerate anyway. The only people who give a damn are the ones who pay.'

He was right. His father had always been right. There was no place for him, especially now that Mom was gone. Who could want him? He was so worthless; nothing like this had ever happened to Bobby or Jerry or Angel. It was such a stupid obvious set up.

They'd be better without him. The darkness called to him and he started towards it, reaching out for it.

"His hand moved. Call Doctor Thomas now, hurry! He'll need to monitor-"

He heard cursing, the squealing of tires and the scrape of metal on metal. Hands touched him, burning hot even through the burning coursing through his body.

"Jackie, look at me." He heard Bobby's voice but couldn't see him. There was only darkness. "Someone call a fucking ambulance!"

"I did!" Crying, a woman, it sounded like Sophia.

"Don't do this Jackie, stay with me you little fairy!" Somewhere he snickered. If only Bobby knew how close to the truth he was. "Please, don't. You can't; you're all I have left. Don't do this to me!"

Jack let go and the last thing he heard were sirens and the crunch of snow, somewhere far away. He let go, expecting the darkness to embrace him.

Only to be soundly smacked in the back of the head. He turned, only to find he didn't really turn because he didn't really have a body to turn with and was kind of just…there. So was Mom. He didn't see her, because she wasn't there, but he did…see her. Somehow. She wasn't saying anything, but something about her…presence, let him know she didn't approve and didn't think this was at all amusing. He shrank away and knew he had to go back.

A smile that wasn't a smile and he shut his eyes for a moment then opened them again to see bright sterile white all around him. There was a pang in his arm and his eyes darted down to see a tube stuck in it and held in place with white tape.

"bobby."

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It was two in the morning and the phone was ringing. Bobby just blinked at it, an icy fear pooling in his gut. He'd been waiting for this call for two weeks; the one that told him that Jackie was gone for good. Every time a nurse came to the waiting room to let him in, every time he left the room to go to the vending machine and came back to find Doctor Thomas in the room checking over the machines, every time the phone rang.

He waiting with a mix of dread and anticipation, heart thudding madly in his chest as adrenaline coursed through his veins. Every time Jackie breathed he held his own breath, praying he'd keep doing it. When the phone rang and it was just Jerry he'd feel drained and stretched too thin…too damn old, but grateful none the less.

He wasn't ready to let him go just yet. It was selfish, Jackie could have been in terrible pain or something lie that but he…couldn't. Not yet.

He picked it up. "Hello?" His voice was a whisper, harsh to his own ears.

"Mr. Mercer, this is Nurse Collins from the hospital. Your brother woke up twenty minutes ago and-"

The rest faded, white noise under the rush of his blood in his brain and the thump of his heart, so loud she had to hear it over the phone.

Awake. Jackie was _awake._

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…man. That…was…yeah. You know…I have three essays I need written by Friday, but instead I'm letting my idiot boyfriend take me to the movies and then letting my idiot brain run away with its damn self, again.

But hey. I've written worse things. Lately, actually…


	2. To Change Our Luck

Rhapsody

I don't own the Four Brothers, but here's how things would have gone it I did

Author: Dimitri Aidan

Rating; R to NC-17, as with most things it's all about the site.

Warnings: Slash, Sex, Violence, Language, Alternate Ending, Incest but not in a biological sense, and …other stuff. I'm a man of few plans but many whims.

Notes: I wouldn't get overly attached to this chapter, as I'm not sure how much I like it. I wrote it around 3 AM and...well, it may vanish and show up re-done at some point, depending on how it looks after I've managed to get some sleep.

Pairings: Bobby/Jackie, Angel/Sophia, Jerry/…Jerry's wife.

Summery: In which Jack doesn't die, but Bobby does let a few things slip. As they try to rebuild and understand what's growing between them, someone seeks to tear it all down

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Chapter Two

Our Luck to Change

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Jackie was tired in a way that he'd never felt before. It wasn't just the urge to yawn and rub at his eyes, but a sort of weariness that curled inside of him and made it near impossible to keep his eyes open in order to hear the doctors talking about him over the top of his head, because heaven forbid they actually said a fucking word to his face.

Bastards.

He suspected what ever drug they were pumping in to him to keep the pain at bay was some really good stuff because he was barely aware of his body and what he was aware of was a tingling floating feeling. It would have been nice if it didn't annoy him so much. Pain meant he was still alive and the more places that hurt the better the chances that everything was in working order.

Jack had never been a real fan of hospitals or the numbness they liked to force onto people. He'd spent a lot of time in hospitals when he was younger. Hell, even after coming to live with Mom he'd spent a nice chunk of time in this particular hospital. Not for lack of trying to keep him safe and with all of his limbs intact on her part, but more an unwillingness to ever back down from anyone else.

He'd put up with a lot of shit as far as school went. Kids whispering about him and his 'unusual' family, to put it nicely. Everyone knew the Mercer Boys were rejects with no futures or anything going for them. Where other kids had two parents and siblings or even one parent they were just…mismatched and pushed together.

They were looked down at for that. They fact they'd all be violent pricks who'd knock the shit out of anyone they thought looked at them funny hadn't helped.

Except in hockey. For all Bobby's mocking Jackie wasn't bad; he was actually pretty good. He knew how the game worked at least and did more than just try to break the other guys nose like his brothers did.

Jackie blinked and choked by a yawn, glaring at the doctor standing next to his bed. Doctor Thomas or something like that. He was more familiar with the Nurse, Rebecca Collins. She'd been here, as a nurse, for longer than Jack was likely to remember and always had a soft spot for the four of them, taking special care to make them comfortable and sneak them candy. She also made the occasional house call, if they asked nicely enough and promised not to get in trouble again.

She had to know by now they never meant what they promised but she'd always come out anyway, ready to clean, stitch, and bandage them up with an exasperated smile.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Jackie sat, frowning at the cast that now covered his right arm. It itched and he hadn't been able to get the nice looking red one with the black flames. Ms. Mercer said breaking his arm while trying to shove Elden Coleman out the back of the bus wasn't something he was rewarded for.

Elden had managed to get away with only a scrap from tumbling out of the bus where as Jackie had been subject to a beating by some of the other boy's cousins. He was fine now of course and had gotten to see Ms. Collins, a woman Mrs. Mercer said was a friend of the family, for a little while. She hadn't stayed long, explaining with a tired smile that she had a 'house visit' to attend to but that she'd see him soon and then given him a kiss on the forehead.

Jackie wasn't sure why she'd done that, since he didn't know her and he wasn't part of the family but he'd liked it. She reminded him of the lady who'd lived down the hall from him, his mother, and his father. She'd been nice and always smiled at him and gave him hard candy.

She'd died a little bit after his mother had and he couldn't really remember her name anymore.

Ms. Mercer pulled into the driveway and, without a word and only a look, ordered him into the house and up to his room. He hurried inside, not wanting to risk further invoking her wrath. He didn't meant to upset her so much and knew it was only a matter of time before his constant fucking up made her get rid of him like all of the other people. He'd been here all of three months and managed to be in six fights, break another boy's nose, and now his own arm.

He could only imagine what Bobby, Angel, and Jerry would have to say when they saw him. They'd probably laugh at him and tell him what a wuss he was for getting jumped by those boys. The idea made his stomach hurt; he really wanted them to like him but they were older and had been with Mrs. Mercer.

He pushed the door open and was about the slink his way up the steps in hopes that no one would see him but Jerry poked his head out of the living room and into the front hall. Jackie stopped and stared at the older boy. Jerry's lip was swollen and he had a bunch of weird butterfly looking things on a cut above his left eye. Still he cracked a painful looking smile when he saw who it was.

"Hey Jackie."

"Um-"

"Jeremiah!" Ms. Mercer strode in after him and, putting a hand on the small of Jackie's back to push him along, walked into the living room. "What happened to you?"

Angel, who was sitting on the floor in front of Jerry and leaning back against the couch, laughed before making a face and touching his chest gingerly. He pulled up the hem of his t-shirt to reveal white bandages stretched over his skin.

"Nothing really." Jerry said with a shrug. "Just a little hockey accident."

"Hockey?" Something in the way she said it made Jackie think she didn't particularly believe what he was saying. "This doesn't have anything to do with what happened to Jack does it?"

"Of course not." Bobby's voice, thin and annoyed, floated from the kitchen. "Like we'd go through all of this for the fairy."

Jackie wound his good arm around himself, reminded of the things his father used to call him late at night. Loud words that hurt his ears, bitter breathe and angry hands all over.

He shivered then looked up at Ms. Mercer whose lips had pressed into a very thin line. "Bobby, don't make me-"

There was the sound of a chair scrapping over tile and then Bobby ambled out of the kitchen, flexing his hand, which had a white bandage on the palm, slowly. Behind him came Ms. Collins from the hospital, a small smile on her lips. Ms. Mercer went silent for a moment then sighed.

"Rebecca. I assume Jerry called you? I hope you didn't put yourself out to take care of these three, I could have-"

Ms. Collins laughed and made a dismissive gesture. "It's fine Evelyn, you know I don't mind. I was about to head home when he called the hospital and there is no reason to spend money on those doctors for what I can fix in a few minutes. Right boys?"

All three nodded their agreement, looking as innocent as three teenagers who looked like they'd been fighting could be. Ms. Mercer rolled her eyes then inclined her head towards the door.

"Let me walk you out then."

Ms. Collins nodded and walked over, stopping to smile at Jackie and press something smooth into his hand. He looked down to see a Hershey bar and when he looked up to say something she was already gone. He closed his fingers around it then looked over at the three teens that were staring back at him. He swallowed and shifted from one foot to the other nervously.

"Next time you plan to take on someone like Coleman let us know." Jerry said finally, sitting back and crossing his arms over his chest.

"Why?"

"So we can watch you get pummeled." Bobby said, looking up from his hand. Jackie winced without meaning too and the oldest boy rolled his eyes. "Don't tell me you're an idiot and a fag."

Angel laughed again, though this time he didn't wince. "We can't let anyone fuck with our little brother, especially not when they want to fight six on one. It's not how we do things."

"Yeah. Don't worry about Elden or his family. Most of them will be pissing blood for a while." Jerry's smile was nothing short of scary.

"They deserve it for being that damn stupid." Bobby muttered while limping over to the couch and sitting next to Jerry. "So, what made you finally crack? We've been making fun of you for months and you've haven't so much as said five words to us, let alone shoved us out of a bus and into traffic."

Jackie was silent for a moment, considering, before shrugging. "He touched me."

"Touched?" Angel repeated. "That's it?"

"He wasn't your type of something?" Bubby asked, shit-eating grin firmly in place.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

He wasn't surprised to see her there, one hand on her hip while the other played with a strand of silver hair, which was falling out of its normally flawlessly pinned up bun. Her coco colored skin had more creases than he remembered, though it was hard to focus on her, because his eyes kept sliding to the side where Thomas was saying something with a bunch of frantic arm waving that gave Jackie a serious headache. He closed his eyes, fully intending to open them once he was sure he wouldn't be sick.

He opened them again to find Collins smoothing down his sheets with a sad smile and the doctor nowhere in sight. The room was brighter, though the lights were off, and he could only assume daylight was coming in through a window he couldn't see.

He must have fallen asleep. Damn drugs.

"You're awake again." Her smile faltered for a moment. "You gave me quite the scare Jackie. I'm much too old to keep up with your antics these days."

He started to tell her she didn't look any older than he remembered but all that came out was a rough gasp and an annoying itching in the back of his throat. She chuckled and reached for something just out of his line of sight. A glass of water with a straw leaning against the edge. She held it while he drank and he fought to not be embarrassed that he couldn't do it himself.

Weakness like this in front of anyone else would have been impossible, but he knew she didn't care and wouldn't speak of it. He half expected her to pull a lollipop from her sweater pocket and tell him to be good. The cup was set aside and she reached for his rest, eyeing the tube with a frown.

"I know how much you hate these things but try to keep it in this time. You wouldn't believe the trouble I had assuring Thomas that you could have visitors without getting over excited so don't you go proving me wrong. He's a foolish man though, thinking he can keep the Mercers bound by silly rules; I'm sure Bobby will have you broken out of here the moment he can." She tugged at his sheet and again smoothed some wrinkle he doubted was there. "I'm so sorry about your mother. I wanted to come to the funeral but… well."

He nodded slightly and closed his eyes again. This time he was aware of the darkness of sleep creeping up on him, not nearly as black as the darkness that had taken him after being shot. He welcomed it and allowed himself to just be there, in the dark, for a while.

When he opened his eyes again it was Jerry he found sitting by his bed, chin resting on his folded hands while he watched with unblinking brown eyes. He scooted forward some when he saw Jackie was awake and smiled.

"Cracker Jack, glad to see you're still with us."

Jackie groaned, wanting to tell the older man that nearly dying didn't mean he'd suddenly think that damn nickname was acceptable. Jerry seemed to understand because his smile went from kind to mocking and Jackie felt strangely at ease.

"You missed a lot, so let me recap. I'm not mixed up with anything, mom tried to turn Sweet in to the cops but he had a few in his pocket, I gave away close to four hundred thousand dollars, Green is dead as is his dirty partner, Bobby kicked Sweet's ass and settled things."

Jack stared, letting that process for a moment before holding up four fingers, trying to communicate what exactly was on his mind. Jerry was silent for a moment then, before Jack could duck, smacked him in head.

"You almost got your ass killed, that money should be the least of your problems."

Jackie shrugged and, with no small amount of effort, pushed himself up so he was sitting. He felt a slight lick of pain from his shoulder but ignored it in favor of looking his brother over. He made a gesture towards his eye and Jerry started to reach up then smiled.

"The cops got a little annoyed when we couldn't tell them where Sweet was."

Jackie arched an eyebrow and swallowed, trying to wet his achingly dry throat. "Yeah?" His voice was hoarse and dry, cracking halfway through that one word. He swallowed again.

"Yeah. Nothing for you to worry about, it's over now."

"Missed the fun."

"If you say so. You always had the strangest idea of what was fun." Jerry said then tilted his head to the side slightly. "I'd stay longer but you can only have one visitor at a time and I know everyone else wants to see you."

"Cool." He really and truly hated his voice at the moment. It was so weak, brittle and threatening to just…shatter if he used it wrong.

Jerry started to get up then hesitated. "Bobby especially."

Jackie blinked then snorted. Doubtful. Bobby probably wanted to tell him how gay he'd been for screaming his name like he'd done and what a true twat he was for running out of the house like he'd done.

Angel and Sophia came in after Jerry, separately. It was for the best; Jackie didn't think he could psychically take the two of them and the drama that followed them all at once. She cried and he told him how glad he was that he was finally awake and that he couldn't wait until he was better so he could kick his sorry ass, because what the fuck had been thinking about. Angel knew he wasn't that fucking stupid and if it wasn't too much trouble maybe next time he could use his damn brain and not just go running off like some kind of idiot every time someone decided to bait him.

Jackie smiled wryly as Angel walked out and leaned back onto his pillows. He could feel the pain more now, and not just in his shoulder but his leg as well. He supposed if he was smart he'd be calling a nurse and asking for more painkillers but, even if he liked that shit, he didn't want to pass out half-way through what was sure to be a threat from Bobby.

Because the fact that he had lived meant that everyone now got to tell him what a stupid prick he was.

The door opened again and in walked Bobby, hands shoved into his coat pockets and with none of his usual confidence. He just looked tired. It was weird.

He didn't sit down, just stared at him until Jackie wanted to either throw something at him or hide, because it was…just damn. Intense and unnerving and it was like Bobby was trying to read his mind or something like that.

"I was worried about you."

Jackie's world did a fantastic job of screeching to a halt. That was Bobby's all too familiar voice, his lips forming the words but hell if that could be Bobby saying them. It was just…not Bobby. No insults or mocking or…

Worried about him?

"What?"

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Note: I checked some stuff out and Sophia is actually Sofi…eh. Too lazy to change it.

Scyllablue: I didn't really get Jack dying either…I just happened to get out of creative writing before I went to go see it and so ended up trying to find a deeper meaning. Now, a week later, I'm pretty much going 'that was so damn pointless' in my head. Jackie had such potential, what with altering between horror at seeing people get shot to almost setting a congressman on fire to screaming his lungs out when people were shooting around him…oh the issues that could lurk in his head. I love a guy with issues.

Zoe: Yes, I shall keep going. I have plans (That center around the laundry room, but I digress) and they must be realized! Or…something along those lines.

Sparkl: Normally I'm not one for altering character death, preferring to simply resurrect my characters from the grave later on, but I didn't see a point and there was UST and…yeah. I went with it.

Dark: Why thank you, thank you.

Mechante: That's right, actual movie viewage is optional more or less, since I pretty much explained the movie and all of the interesting stuff starts in the past anyway. The original storyline has been departed from, yes. It was stupid (the part I'm departing from) and…eh. My boyfriend and my brain know it's all love, just…an annoyed kind of love. Damn it, I wanted to see The Brothers Grimm…


	3. Make this Go Away, and Let Me Rest

Rhapsody

I don't own the Four Brothers, but here's how things would have gone it I did

Author: Dimitri Aidan

Rating: R to NC-17, as with most things it's all about the site.

Warnings: Slash, Sex, Violence, Language, Alternate Ending, Incest but not in a biological sense, and …other stuff. I'm a man of few plans but many whims.

Pairings: Bobby/Jackie, Angel/Sophia, Jerry/…Jerry's wife.

Summery: In which Jack doesn't die, but Bobby does let a few things slip. As they try to rebuild and understand what's growing between them, someone seeks to tear it all down

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Chapter Three

Make this Go Away, and let me Rest

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"_I'm worried about you Jackie." _

_He chuckled darkly, looking at his mother through the thick curtain of his hair. She'd already smoothed a bandage over the cut above his eyebrow, though not before tormenting him with disinfectant in her usual fashion even though he knew she had the stuff that didn't sting hidden in her first aid somewhere, and was now watching him now. She had her chin propped up in one palm and her eyes seemed to just stare through him as they always did. _

"_Hey, it's not anything serious. This…it's done with. Over." _

"_This one is over but if it's not one thing it's another and they always end up with you bleeding." She sighed and shook her head; sadness seemed to cling to the air around her. It reached out with icy fingers and clawed at his throat, making it hard for him to breath. He hated that look on her face, hated to put it there. "You can't keep going like this, you'll end up killing the both of us." _

"_Ma-"_

"_Don't you 'Ma' me Jackie!" Her tone was sharp and he jumped, chair legs scratching over the floor. She blinked, eyes wide for a moment, and then she looked away from him. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't…I didn't mean to snap at you." _

_He wanted to reach out to her, to calm his pounding heartbeat. In the nine years he'd been with her he didn't think she'd ever raised her voice. Even her punishments were mild, leaving the more serious things to Bobby and Jerry because she just couldn't bring herself to lay a hand on him. He'd seen her cry once, when he'd gotten expelled in tenth grade. Bobby had come back from wherever it was he'd been that very night and hauled Jackie into the basement, heedless of his protests. _

_It'd been so much like…something his father would have done that it'd made his head swim. Dragging him someplace dark, where no one could here him and… But it was Bobby. He'd turned on the overhead light, sat on the ragged couch, lit a cigarette and had him explain himself. Bobby didn't just wail on him, not that Jerry did either, but he wanted answers. They'd talk for hours, until the sun was up, that night._

_And then came the punishment. Bobby had been gone by noon and when Jackie finally brought himself out of the basement and slunk into his bedroom he'd heard her crying and it'd nearly made him cry as well. Because of him…she was crying because of him. _

"_Ever since your brother's moved away…I just don't know." _

_He was silent for a moment, watching her before finally letting out a breath and standing up. "Yeah…I've been thinking. The guys were talking about taking the band on the road and…I'm leaving. You won't have to worry about me anymore."_

_She smiled almost ruefully and shook her head. "What am I going to do with you, hmm? You've spent your whole life running away Jackie; do you really want to keep going? I'm not going to be around forever to clean up your cuts." _

For a long moment Jack could only stare at Bobby, who stared back at him with an eerie kind of intensity, not blinking once. Finally Jackie looked away. He could hear Bobby's footsteps, strangely loud in the nearly silent room, and sit in the plastic chair everyone else had occupied. Jackie looked up as it whined pathetically under Bobby's weight, watched as his fingers immediately sought out the cracks in the plastic of the armrest, digging inside.

"Worried?" His voice was still very much harsh and cracked around the edges, like the chair. The words burned his throat, cutting at it as if he'd swallowed a handful of knives. He coughed which only made it that much worse.

"Worried. I was worried you'd never wake up and I wouldn't be able to tell you what a stupid fuck you've turned out to be." Bobby's fingers twitched, pulling out some of the ugly yellow stuffing from the chair. Jackie smiled wryly.

This was much better, or at least more understandable from Bobby. If there was one thing he'd never been able to really get his mind around it was the easy way the others related, talked, and touched each other. When he'd first come to live with them he'd hated to even be looked at and those who did ran the risk of being hurt. Touch wasn't even an option, except all of a sudden it was not only an option it was just the way things were.

It had been less about a slap or a punch because he'd done something wrong and more about a hand up or a hug or just a friendly gesture and…it had made them so hard to just shut out. He'd always been expecting to just be tossed out at any second, like in every other home he'd been in, and hadn't wanted to be attached or care and they had made it so hard for him.

Even now he was wary. He knew he separated himself from his brothers, stood off in corners or sat in the far away chair when they all grouped together just…because. He knew they saw it but they never said anything to him. They'd always allowed him to take the space he needed but never tried to shut him out like he shut them out. He could lose them in an instant, and that was a thought that made him wish he'd just never woken up, and anything left undone or unsaid was his fault because they…they always left the door open and would allow him in.

He just…couldn't. He sometimes thought that Bobby understood that more than the other's did, with his cold smirks and sometimes harsh words. He understood that sometimes Jackie just…just needed that edge, the distance.

Bobby was willing to push him away for his own sake, and wasn't that twisted?

"Don't fucking smile, I'm serious. Ever do some shit like that again and I'll fucking kill you with my bare hands, understand me?" Bobby did look damn serious so Jackie nodded slowly. Bobby nodded, apparently satisfied with that, and sat back in his chair. "So, how do you feel?"

"Like shit."

"Good." Bobby's smile was borderline sadistic. "You deserve it."

Sometimes Jackie forgot that that upsetting Bobby was a dangerous dangerous thing to do, that would result in all sorts of painful things. Some of them had even been more painful, and memorable, than being shot had been. Even now the memory was fuzzy around the edges, hazy, but Jackie very clearly recalled an incident that involved being tied up naked and left in the front lawn in January until Mom had come home. He had to say that ranked pretty high. It'd been damn cold and everyone and their mother had walked past, pointed, and then scattered when they saw Bobby watching in the front window, like he was the only one allowed to delight in Jackie's pain.

Stupid bastard.

"Don't think this is the worst of it." Bobby's words were more of a promise than a threat as he leaned back once again, chair creaking in protest.

"Bobby-"

"Don't even. What the hell was going on in that nearly empty head of yours?" This was all said in the same mocking tone that Bobby always used with him, holding none of the anger that Jackie would have expected from him. "Did you really think some masked jackass throwing snowballs wasn't some kind of a setup?"

It seemed really obvious in hindsight of course but at the time he'd just needed to get out the house and that masked jackass had been just the escape he needed. He couldn't say that of course. Just shrugged, uncomfortable with his own thoughts and burrowed deeper into his bed, hoping Bobby would either get bored or get angry.

This was just a little…weird. It made him feel out of sorts.

"Right. Well. Sweets de…is missing. The police suspect us but I can't imagine why that is, group of upstanding citizens that we are." Jackie's lips twitched just slightly. Upstanding citizens…right. "We gave most of the insurance away to…charity, but we kept enough for your hospital bills and to fix up the house after that shoot out you caused."

Jackie groaned. "Why you make it sound like everything's my fault?"

"Because it is, dumbshit." Bobby said simply. He sighed and Jackie barely had time to shift over before his booted feet were on his bed. They were dirty in comparison to the pressed and starched sheets he was lying under. A welcome change, all of this white sterilization was wearing on him already. "I really thought I'd taught you better."

Jackie winced slightly, the familiar feeling of ice clawing at him returning. It'd taken time but he'd finally been able to identify it for what it was: Guilt. Every time his mother had cried it'd been there and now, with Bobby…yeah.

"I…Bobby, I'm sorry. I was…stupid."

There was a pause and then Bobby nodded, tilting his head back to look at the ceiling. "I know."

"It wasn't you." Well…not completely anyway. He couldn't very well blame his own raging stupidity on other people though; he'd been stressed but that wasn't a reason to put everyone at risk like that. Any one of them could have been hurt because of him.

And not just them, but any of the dozens of kids who lived on their street. Their mother would have…she was just as adamant about protecting the neighborhood kids as she was about protecting them. She wouldn't have been pleased, to say the least, if Jackie had gotten one of them hurt.

"I know." He could picture Bobby's smirk perfectly, that 'I can do not wrong' smirk that made Jackie's stomach clench and heart beat faster. "I just wish you'd think about stuff. What do you think we would have done if we'd had to bury you too?"

Jack's hands clenched in the sheets for a moment and he let out a shaky breath. "I don't know man, I don't..."

Bobby made a noise that, as far as Jackie could tell, was just a more annoying way to 'I know'. There was a long moment of silence and finally he slumped back in his bed. His throat still hurt something awful, but he couldn't not talk to Bobby, and the place where the IV went through his skin ached a little bit. Actually everything kind of hurt, but the IV more than anything.

He didn't think that made much sense but that was the truth.

"How long?" He asked, looking up again and hoping Bobby knew what he meant. He was already trying to talk as little as possible; he wasn't up to explaining himself in full if he could help it. Bobby started at him for a moment, apparently not knowing what he meant, so Jackie held up his arm and indicated the tube.

"How long are you going to be in here?" Jackie nodded. "Well…they probably want to keep you a while. Make sure you're free of infection, healing up right, and all that good shit. You were unconscious for three weeks. Drama queen."

Jackie sighed irritably. He didn't want to be in here for some long ass time. Hell, he didn't want to be here now.

"But I guess we can find a way to get you out as soon as you want." Bobby's smirk was dark but amused. "Jerry's going to have my ass for it, but as long as you promise not to die on me we can work something out."

"Now?"

"Don't be impatient. Give it a few days." Bobby's feet left the bed and he stood, smoothing some of the dirt onto the floor. "I'll be back in a few hours, it's early as hell and I was only supposed to be in here ten minutes. Can't aggravate you 'delicate' condition."

"Fuck you."

"You'd like that wouldn't you?" Bobby smirked almost cruelly and Jackie just rolled his eyes, falling into the old pattern. Bobby made jokes, he denied them, and life went on. "Later fairy."

He waved absently. He heard the door click shut and shook his head, trying to force down the dizziness it brought on. Alone again, though he was sure a nurse or doctor would be along soon enough to make sure he wasn't dying or something.

Still, without Bobby distracting him it was only a matter of moments before the pain crept up on him like so many ants crawling over his skin and demanding his attention. His throat felt even dryer than before but he didn't feel like making the effort to reach the plastic cup of water sitting on the dresser.

He groaned softly and shut his eyes. If there was anything he could deal with it was pain and, the one tried and true method, sleeping through it. He doubted there was anything pressing that would demand him being conscious and if he wanted to avoid being pumped full of God only knew what he'd probably have to spend a lot of time asleep.

Hopefully he had one of those neglectful nurses who forgot how often they drugged him. (1)

000000000000

After dropping Sofi off to help Camille with Danielle and Amelia for the day, Bobby headed in the general direction of the hardware store. Angel and Jerry, who was in the backseat, were both silent and the only sound in the car was the sputtering of the heater and some old blues station on the radio. He'd gotten his car back, after a fuck load of work and the most through detailing ever, and yet the damn heater still didn't work right.

It'd never worked right though, not since he'd bought the heap all those years ago. It'd been a few years after he'd first moved out and started more or less roaming the country aimlessly. He'd seen the car and bought it on the spot, one of the first things he'd obtained legally on his own. He remembered the first time he'd brought it home; the indulgently horrified look on their mother's face, the excited looks of his brothers; Jackie had been-

"Where the hell are we going?" Angel asked and Bobby looked at him from the corner of his eye, then looked back at Jerry who just looked bemused.

"The hardware store. Don't you listen at all?" Jerry asked, thumping the back of Angel's seat. "We've been talking about it all week."

"Why now? I thought Bobby liked the outdoors." Angel had been on him about staying in the house in for a while now. He seemed to think because him and his girl couldn't stand it that Bobby shouldn't be able to either. Bobby usually ignored him.

"Jackie." Jerry, being his usually annoyingly observant self, said. Bobby's eyes flickered up the rearview mirror to find the other man staring right at him. "Whenever he gets out he can't exactly live there if the place is full of holes and it snows on the inside."

"Oh." Angel frowned for a moment then nodded. "Did the doctors say how long they were keeping him?"

Jerry started to say something but Bobby cut him off, knowing whatever the doctors said wasn't what was going to happen. The faster they got this done the better. "I give it a week, tops."

"A week? He nearly died, no way are they just-" Angel started, sitting up. His eyes sparked with rage, as if he was considering having a word with the doctors in question.

"No, I give it a week before he gets fed up and walks out." Bobby muttered. "He wants to leave now; I told him I'd get him out in a few days."

"No way Bobby!" Now Jerry looked outraged. It wasn't a good look for him. "Are you insane? …No, don't answer that, of course you are. How could you tell him that? He needs to be at the hospital, where they can look after him and make sure nothing happens. I have a family to look after already, I can't take care of Jackie too."

Bobby didn't say anything, taking in the slightly anguished tone to Jerry's voice as he said it. He knew it wasn't that Jerry didn't want to, it was that he couldn't. Between Camilla, the girls, and his 'dream' he wouldn't have the time, funds, or patience to make sure Jackie was okay.

"Well…I'll be around for a while." Angel said finally. "In theory…if we don't get called out. And Sofi will be there. We're gonna do it right this time, no more fucking around."

"It's fine." Bobby said finally. His knuckles were turning why from the way he was griping the wheel but he managed to keep his frustration from his voice. There was something…infuriating about the way they dismissed his presence, like he'd get up and leave the minute Jackie got of the hospital. "I'll look after him."

"For how long?" Jerry snapped, glaring. "You can't say you're going to there and them up and leave the minute you get bored or restless. Jackie-"

"I'm going to take care of him!" He bit out. The silence that met that was deafening. Both of his brothers were unreadable, faces closed and eyes emotionless. He let out a breathe through his nose, glad for the red light they'd just rolled up to. He took his suddenly sweaty hands off the wheel and wiped them along the seat. "Look-"

"Fuck." Angel muttered. Bobby had to admit that summarized things up rather well.

"Bobby this…" Jerry leaned back, putting a hand over his eyes. "This is fucked up. That stuff you said out there, it-"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Well you have to! Before…before Jackie gets out of the hospital at least. You can't just keep it bottled up and pretend it didn't happen."

"You been watching Dr. Phil again? I told you, that shit will rot your brain."

"Jesus." Jerry rubbed a hand over his face. "Whatever. You serious? You gonna stick around this time? Make sure nothing happens?"

"Yeah, I am."

"And you aren't going to do anything weird, right?" Angel asked, looking more serious than he had any right to. Bobby looked at him then, heedless of the fact the light was now green, reached over and punched him. Jerry sighed loudly, muttering something about annoying children.

Like it was his fault Angel was an idiot.

0000000000

1. No disrespect to any nurses meant, of course. My mother's an LPN so I have a healthy respect for nurses.

…yes. Well. That was…something. I swear, I never know what to say at the end of a chapter.


End file.
